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Why are we dying to live, if we living to die?

8th August, 2008. 10:18 pm. Whoa...haven't posted in ages :)

Well it's been about a year since I last posted. I'm in college now and loving it. FLORIDA STATE BABY! I think I need to go to MMO rehab. I have an intense case off A.D.D. when it comes to starting an MMO. I get to about level 15 or so (depending on the MMO) and I'll get homicidal and kill my character. I need helpppp lol All I really had to say for now. More to come later.

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31st May, 2007. 9:30 pm.

God, grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
the courage to change the things I can;
and the wisdom to know the difference.

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29th May, 2007. 12:33 pm. So...

All the realms in WoW are currently down so I decided to kill some time and actually post a new entry (GASP!)

First and foremost, HAPPY POST-MEMORIAL DAY TO ALL!!


I've been to two barbecues in the past two days. Yay me! I also graduated from this little thing called HIGH SCHOOL last week (fuck yea, I'm going to college). The ceremony was great because it was fast as hell.

WoW Update: I got the burning crusade expansion pack like a few months back and of course I made a BE Mage named Dean. He's level 29 as we speak. But after a few mishaps in Shadowfang Keep, I decided to give him a breather. So I rolled a pally on a PVP realm and named him Cadillac! WOOT! LOOK A NIGGA UP ON ARTHAS REALM! Just made him yesterday and he's already level 17. Ghostlands are always a clean sweep though. Hopefully by the time I leave for FSU Orientation on Monday I'll have already slain Dar'khan (again) and will be on my way to Orgrimaar to kick it with Thrall.

Poker Update: I'm a poker addict. Plain and simple. I came in 2nd place about a week ago, in a tournament that started with 630 people. So I'm at least proud of myself :)

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10th April, 2007. 6:18 am. I would be feeling great right now...

...if today was opposite day. She up and chose to go back with him rather than start anew with me. As they say "Same shit. New Day". I feel like crap and my heart is ready to explode (literally, my chest is hurting). Time for school. Time to get this shit over and go to Tallahassee.

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31st March, 2007. 10:36 am. Prom 2007

So yeah, Prom was last night. I went there in a limo with Demarcuz, Krystle, and Melissa. Before we went to prom, we went to TGIF's. We took so long there that we got to prom at like 9 and only got to spend like an hour there. So let me back up a little.

First off, I hate George. I hate him becuz he was right. He talked to me on Friday and told me that I'd be uncomfortable with my ex-girl sitting across from me with her new bf. GRRRRRRRR!!! I'm just gettin used to this whole deal I guess. I'm just a dork like that who takes forever to get over someone. WOOP DEE FREAKIN DOO!

So we get to Fridays and Demarcuz reveals his plan to sit alone with his Krystle. I'm just thinking to myself "ohhh kay." I was stuck eating with Melissa, who def doesn't eat too lady like. Basically the entire night was more for them than me. This is the revelation that I have come to. I am never the one doing the happy, just the one making the happy. The last time I was truly happy was when I was with Tasha. I was happy with Krystle too, but just not as happy.

WHY AM I HERE? NOT THAT BEING IS HERE IS WRONG, I JUST WANT TO BE ALRIGHT.
We finally left Fridays and arrived at the prom around 9 like i said. We got some dances in. I danced with Brittney to like one slow song and one little dance with Krystle, but the majority of the time was Demarcuz with Krystle and me with Melissa. Did I have a good time? Did I enjoy myself? Was this the most memorable night of my life? well no and no and yes.
I guess its what my dad said. Its for the girls really. Us fellas are just along for the ride. We're there to help make their night the best. So I'm not gonna stress over it anyways.

We left the prom around 10:30 and the whole ride back home was very interesting. In this case, interesting can be defined as "who's shoes did I step on to get this treatment?" Those two were just going at it like Cats & Dogs. This entire night opened up my eyes to the TRUTH. It allowed me to finally understand one thing: my life is shitty.

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12th March, 2007. 8:42 pm. Loose Ends

Well I finally told Krystle today what was on my mind. I told her how I'm really not looking for a long term relationship goign into college unless she planning on moving to Tallahassee with me. LONG DISTANCE is def out of the question. Yeah she was sad and upset and whatnot but its like, that's the deal, so deal with it.

Demarcuz left some message on my phone cussing me out just becuz i told Krystle "fuck demarcuz". Well i can do that cuz i'm Nick, and your not. I never liked him anyways and I told her that too. I told her she doesn't deserve to be treated like shit from him. He's always throwing guilt on her and shit. "If you don't go with me then I'm gonna stop eating, thus killing myself!" STFU, eat shit & Die.

I made a huge decision to delete my lvl 26 Night elf rogue the other day. You will be Missed Feorac, but hey, I have a short attention span and i kept getting OWNed by those damn Defias fuckers. Stealth has never been my strong suit. I attempted making an Orc warrior, which turned out horribly. Now I have a lvl 15 Human Paladin, which btw OWNs everyone that steps into the path of his L.A.K.O.B.(Large Ass-Kicking Own Blade). Oh wait, I have a mace now. NVM!!! lol I also created a dwarf hunter in a Role-playing realm which isn't that bad. Only thing i don't like is running around Dun Morgh doing dumb shit, but tha'll end soon. MWAHAHAHAHahA! I'm planning on staying off of my paladin so that he can build up rest experience and whatnot. I'll see how he's doing on Friday maybe. I might not actually play WoW for a while becuz of my next news:

GOD OF WAR 2 RELEASES ON WEDNESDAY!! And yes, I already pre-ordered a copy, so I just have to go in and pick up my reserved copy. Considering the first one took a month out of my time, this one will def drain away my WoW playing hours. Especially since spring break is coming up, which adds about 40 more hours of playing time at least.

TO RECAP: I'm not planning on having a gf going into college. I need a fresh start and new ends to tie. I'm still going to stay in touch with all of my friends but that's it. My Night Elf is R.I.P. right now. I now have a paladin & hunter. GOW2 will possess me so don't plan on having full convos with me after Wednesday.

That is all for now, my pretties!!! MWAH!!!!!

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3rd February, 2007. 10:43 am. FAJiTAS FOR EVERYONE!!!

WOOOOOOOO!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY BLACK ASS!!!! <3

17 years and I'm still breathing? Damn, somebody must've fucked up!

I wanna give a shout out to:

-all my niggas from Cell Block Q
-My LJ Homies:
-Jazze Fizz, whoa man you def pulled me outta the fire about 200 times and guided me to the top o' the mountain...SWERVE! lol
-Sherry, don't really know ya on a "i've talked to her" basis. But you've yet to delete me on LJ so we cooler than Billy Dee's face on the other side of the pillow. Look me up on WoW homie.
-My Loving Parents!
-My Non-Pediophilic Loving Teachers!
-All My GREAT Friends:
-Jazze Fizz, damn dawg how u get on here twice? ily <3
-Brittknee, my sister til the day we die. W/e shit u been thru or i been thru we been right there for each other. Stay Fly, Stay High.
-Nena, i ain't forget you dawg. We been straight since Spanish 1. I STILL WANNA FACK YOU GIRL! lol
-Katz, my brother from another mother. We been thru it all and still had enuff babies left over. OJOS GRANDES!
-Everyone else I forgot, which is probably alot. (rhyme master?)

Well once again, thank you to all of y'all. I love every single one of ya'll like an adopted child from Africa.

Now I'm gonna go make some breakfast and play sum WoW. Hop Off!

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22nd January, 2007. 6:41 pm. So like wow...

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!

ok i needed that off my chest.

Today was a normal ass day.

EXCEPT FOR:

1) Laura bitching about me supposedly "implying" she's a slut even though she told me for fuckin 4 months straight about how she's only been with and loved Adam.

2) I broke down on the bus for God knows why. Well Nick does know why. It was becuz I was listening to a sad ass song and started thinking about how great me and Tasha USED TO BE. Fuck man I miss her. I miss how we used to hold each other and shit. FUCK EVERYONE INVOLVED IN HER LEAVING ME, ESPECIALLY ME AND HER. Cuz it was most likely our fault she left. FUCK SHIT ON A TOOTHPICK! Grrr, why couldn't things just be fucking simple!? A year before I didn't even know who the fuck either one of them were and now I'm DYING over both. That leads me to...

3) It started out with me looking for her old cactus photos and it ended in me reading about the bad times. BAD isn't enuff to describe those times. FUCKED UP TIMES is better. I wish I knew every single thing I know now and I could go back in time to back then. Back when I had no question of happiness. When I didn't feel abandoned or helpless or alone or just so fucking depressed. LIFE SUCKS AND THEN YOU DIE! Well fuck that, death better not be near my door. Shit is tough enuff as it is, with both of my gals being light years away soon, death's just the cherry on top. I probably need help, or therapy, or maybe even tranquilizers.

I know one thing I DEFINITELY need.

And that's to get my fucking life together.

Current mood: fuck?.

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1st January, 2007. 10:54 am. Welcome to 2007!

First off, Have a HaPPy NeW YeaR, EveryonE!


06 can kiss what I twist!

ok...now that THAT'S out of my system.

This is a new day, a new dollar.
I'm ready for whatever the new year feels like throwing my way.
I feel like a new man (maybe cuz i just took a shower?).

The final stretch to Graduation is before me and baby I'm gonna run it. Even if it wears down every bone in my body, i'm gonna keep running. Run until you break the tape. Once You know for a fact that you're THERE, then you can lay down.

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27th December, 2006. 7:27 pm. Merry Post-mas!

I say that cuz Christmas was like DAYS ago. I had a good one. Chilled in North Carolina with my fam and my CUTE LITTLE NIECE!!!! She gots to be my fam cuz she so damn cute.

Winndixie hasn't called back yet. The bastards.

Katz got engaged and FIRED FROM HIS JOB all in the same week. Stealing is ALWAYS wrong!!!

But todayyyyyyy.....zzzzZZZZ....oh wait what was I saying? Oh yeah! TODAY WAS THE GREATEST DAY I'VE HAD IN A LONGGGGGGGG TIME.

REASONS WHY IT WAS GREAT:
1) Didn't have to deal with anybody else's stressed out crap of a life.
2) No bullshit.
3) I woke up early!
4) I have my game and a RING WATCH!!!
5) I went to the museum and the mall with the GREATEST FUCKING GIRL ALIVE!!! (greatest dead would be like Harriet Tubman or something)

JAZZ FIZZ. U. COMPLETE. ME. <3.



Nuff said.

Current mood: ecstatic.

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